Baby coloured glasses?

Having a child is akin to removing your heart from your body and placing it at the center of a stampede. You’re vulnerable. You’re scared. You’re going to get hurt – repeatedly.

I was watching a TV show the other day where a baby was kidnapped to get to her grandfather. I can’t shed a single tear at funerals, but I broke down crying in front of the TV. I saw my little girl in place of that baby and my brain played a hundred different scenarios in my head.  My dad isn’t a Mafia drug lord and neither is my father-in-law. There’s really no reason for my daughter to be kidnapped when we live in one of the safest cities in the world, yet I cried. Somebody stepped on my heart.

I can’t read the news anymore. All objectivity is lost. I got into a heated argument with my husband about the impact of increased refugee numbers on the European economies. While he spoke about jobs, infrastructure and taxation, all that I could think of was one thing – what if I had to put my child on a boat in the open ocean, because that was my best shot at protecting them? Hundreds of people stomped on my heart.

A heart so trodden on, is a heart that hurts. It’s a heart that fears. Then again, a heart so trodden on, is a heart that empathizes. It’s a heart that cares.

I pause to think every time I read the news. Perhaps that person who just died left behind a scared child. I keep my anger in check. There might be a crying baby in the car that didn’t give me way. I give more. The waiter who served me today could be tending to a sick child at home.

I view the world differently now. The little person that eats my food and hugs me only when her hands are sticky, has changed me. Has she slipped baby-coloured glasses on my eyes or taken away the veil of indifference that I’d knitted over them? I don’t know, but I do wonder – would the world be a better place if we were all mothers?

2 thoughts on “Baby coloured glasses?

  1. You really did just explain what I have been trying to tell my hubby. That I am not overly sensitive but instead “a mom ” which is an over empath. I too never watch the news which ends badly with me waking up crying because of the rerun in my head of the last news ,where a women lost her 3 kids in a car crash . That to me seems like the end of the world. My baby truly has changed me for the better. You put it very well saying that these baby coloured glasses truly can be the cure to world ridden with hate & anger. A delight of an article to read & know that there are other crazy mommies crying their eyes out hehe. Thank you 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

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